Them PEtA folks done went ta court an' got theyseves a rulin' ta stop the annual New Year's Eve possum drop in Brasstown, N.C.
Ever' year, the Brasstowners'd catch theirselves a possum, put 'im in a cage and feed 'im up real good, and then at midnight on New Year's Eve, they'd lower 'im on down nice and slow, open the cage, and let the varmint run off into the woods. PEtA decided that was inhumane, and they got a judge to go along with it.
Now, what could be more humane than feeding him a nice dinner and then letting him run off back into the woods? Freedom on the first of the year, and all that. After all:
“Their destiny in life is to be run over,” he said. “So if you don’t get run over in 2012, I’ve extended his life to 2013.”
But thanks to PEtA, this year they're going to use either a stuffed animal or a roadkill.
“It’ll either be a stuffed animal or road kill,” he told Fox News. “We’re not gonna break no laws.”
Wittingly or not, though, it must be admitted that PEtA has a point: turning a possum loose into the woods isn't quite like returning it to its natural habitat; for a possum, habitat consists of an old tire slung underneath the front porch.