Most guys just get a vasectomy performed by a doctor. Then there's this guy:
WENATCHEE — Authorities say Martin Eugene Hoyer was on the second day of a methamphetamine binge when he decided to kick in a neighbor’s door to rescue her from hallucinatory “Mexicans.”
When he did so, the handgun in his waistband discharged, sending a bullet through his lower abdomen and into his scrotum, police said.
Hoyer, 51, survived the gunshot and now is charged with first-degree assault, felony harassment and four counts of unlawful possession of a firearm. He faces arraignment in Chelan County Superior Court on Monday.
Hoyer told police he saw “Mexicans in the trees” outside his apartment complex “getting ready to jump out and attack him,” and said two more “Mexicans” went to a second neighbor’s apartment downstairs from his own, urging her to open Hoyer’s door so they could rob him.
Hoyer said he went to his downstairs neighbor’s apartment with the pistol in his waistband to “save” her from the “Mexicans.” When he raised his leg to kick the door, the firearm went off.
That whole thing should've lived things up in the sleepy little town. This gem of a fella has, unsurprisingly, more than a passing acquaintance with our judicial system: he's been convicted of four felonies. Which brings us to the little matter of a felon in possession of a firearm. Several firearms, actually - thus the four counts of unlawful possession.
Bail was set at $50,000. He's still in jail.
