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And Now, The Rest Of The Story

A woman in Oregon was fighting for her life Tuesday after plunging 16 stories down the garbage chute of a Portland condo a day earlier, officials said. Portland Fire and Rescue said on Twitter the incident happened around 1 p.m. local time at a building on West Burnside Avenue across the street from Providence Park, where the Portland Timbers play.

Witnesses reportedly said the woman got into the garbage chute and then fell 16 stories before landing in the garbage collection area, according to the rescue agency.

Portland Fire & Rescue spokesman Rich Chatman told the Oregonian the woman, who was not a resident of the building, sustained head injuries in the fall. “I can say there was a mental health component involved,” he told the newspaper.

Unmentioned is the fact that she somehow entered the building and went to an apartment on the 16th floor, which she basically then trashed. There was broken stuff all over the place in there. Apparently satisfied with her handiwork, she decided to take the express-way down - the garbage chute. Yeah, it seems that the PF&R mouthpiece was correct in noting that there was a mental health component involved.

 

Free Compost In Washington State

About 30 gray whales have stranded in Washington so far this year – the most in about two decades. 

Sinking the whale in the water requires a permit from the EPA and the process is costly, according to NOAA, requiring towing and concrete blocks.

So, NOAA is looking for private landowners with beachfront property willing to let the whales decompose in their backyards.

Evidently they learned from Oregon's experience: blowing them up doesn't work so well.

 

The Smiting

When it's your time it's your time. He should've bought a lottery ticket instead.

Florida is the lightning capital of the world; hardly an afternoon or early evening goes by without it.

The Jokes Just Write Themselves

911 dispatch received a call from a group of Utah police officers stuck in the elevator of the public safety building the 911 operator was located in. There was a bit of confusion at first but soon after, the officers were rescued from the elevator.

Here is a transcript provided by the Salt Lake Fire Department of the 911 call.

911 what’s your emergency?

-“This is the police”

Yes sir, this is the police, what’s the nature of your emergency?

-“No, this is the police”

Correct again sir, how can we help you?

-“No, this is literally the police. We’re calling you from an elevator. We seem to have put too many humans onto this thrill ride and now we’re stuck!”

Sir, did I hear that right? You are stuck in the elevator and you need help getting out?

-“That’s correct ma’am.”

Copy, what’s the address of the building?

-“Uh...that’s the thing, see, it’s THIS building. The one you’re currently in ma’am.”

SIR, did I copy you’re stuck in the elevator of our own public safety building?

-“Yes ma’am. And we need help getting out. This is not a drill, I repeat, this is not a drill.”

Copy that sir, we are sending the fire department over to rescue you.

What can you say?

Under Pressure

You're not alone; your dog is stressing too.

When dog owners go through a stressful period, they're not alone in feeling the pressure — their dogs feel it too, a new study suggests. Dog owners experiencing long bouts of stress can transfer it to their dogs, scientists report in a study published Thursday in Scientific Reports.

Cats? Not so much. But they don't have the same sort of bonding mentality that dogs have.

The Swedish researchers focused on 58 people who own border collies or Shetland sheepdogs. They examined hair from the dog owners and their dogs, looking at the concentrations of a hormone called cortisol, a chemical released into the bloodstream and absorbed by hair follicles in response to stress.

Depression, excessive physical exercise and unemployment are just a few examples of stress that can influence the amount of cortisol found in your hair, said Lina Roth of Linkoping University in Sweden.

And when your cortisol levels go up, so do those in your dog.

It's All About The Benjamins, Baby

A team of TriMet workers made an unusual discovery on a light rail train last month: a “wad of cash” totaling some $10,000.

TriMet said the team of workers was checking boxes of sand, which is sometimes used to give train wheels more traction, when one of the workers found the cash.

The money was turned over to police, and has not been claimed.

 

Latest From San Fran-Freako

SAN FRANCISCO (CBS SF) — San Franciscans may soon be able to bounce their way around town, if a Swedish-based mobility company has its way.

Earlier this month, start-up company Cangoroo announced plans to deploy hundreds of pogo sticks in select cities to directly compete with electric scooters as a transportation option.

Should be really interesting when they hit a few of the poo-patches littering the streets and sidewalks down there.

Is There Such A Thing As Falling Up?

When 94-year-old former President Jimmy Carter fell and broke his hip recently, he exemplified the danger that falling down represents for the elderly. Indeed, falls are the leading cause of accidental death for Floridians age 55 and older, according to the most recent data.

I'd have figured that most deaths are accidental, and having driven in Florida, where so many of the old farts peer through the steering wheel, I'd have guessed that wrecks would be the leading cause of death down there. Apparently, not so. Maybe they fall before they reach the car.

 

Beware The Old Lady

A 102-year-old woman went off her rocker at a French retirement home and killed her 92-year-old neighbour, according to a report.

The unidentified centenarian was taken to a psychiatric hospital after allegedly attacking the nonagenarian at the old age facility in Chézy-sur-Marne, northern France, according to the BBC.

The woman’s cause of death was determined to be strangulation and blows to the head, according to an autopsy.

Too much paté, eh?

 

Meth Actually Can Benefit, Depending On Dose

Ask your doctor about methamphetamine. It's not a phrase you'll ever hear on TV or the radio, but here's a secret: Meth is an incredible medicine. Even the Drug Enforcement Administration admits it, and doctors are known to prescribe it for narcolepsy, obesity, and ADHD. Historically, meth has been used to reverse barbiturate overdoses and even raise blood pressure during surgery. Some preliminary research suggests that meth can be neuroprotective against stroke and traumatic brain injury, even stimulating the growth of brain cells.

Who knew?

If you ask most people, including policymakers, you'll hear that meth is a scourge that can do no good.

But if you've ever used something like Vicks VapoInhaler, you've experienced the healing benefits of meth firsthand. That's because the over-the-counter nasal decongestant contains levomethamphetamine, the levorotary form—or "mirror image"—of the same stuff from Breaking Bad. Procter & Gamble tries to obscure this fact by spelling the active ingredient "levmetamfetamine." Selegiline, a drug for treating Parkinson's and Alzheimer's diseases, also metabolizes into levomethamphetamine.

Interesting read, well worth the visit.